Serena & Ian by A Fist Full of Bolts

Tell us a little about yourselves, what you do, what you love, what is unique about you and your relationship … We live in sunny Venice, California – a stone’s throw from Abbot Kinney and the beach – and work in entertainment; I’m a producer and writer, Ian a director and cinematographer.

We met and fell in love on the set of Larry King’s talk show in 2012 – a romance we managed to keep clandestine for all of maybe two weeks – and have since had the incredible fortune of working together all over the continent (next we jump the pond!). We’re big fans of biking around our neighborhood and foreign cities, telling stories that bring underexplored truths to light, and sundowners with several rounds of backgammon. Ian is a man of immense and effortless integrity, a quality I fall in love with over and over. He grounds my wildly extroverted nature, thankfully loves my flirtatious confidence, and is the wisest soul I know.

The first time we saw each other, we distinctly remember thinking the other looked like trouble. Seven years in, we’re proud to say we feel the same way.

Tell us about your special day, was there a specific theme or style? Tell us a little about the setting, the styling and some of your favourite details…

When we headed to San Jose del Cabo, Mexico, last December, we did not have finding a wedding venue in mind; our goals were oriented squarely on canoodling with the sun on our skin and a cocktail in hand. But we fell in love with the town’s laidback charm, and then Acre – an improbable jungle oasis at the foothills of the Los Cabos mountains with an award-winning restaurant and boutique hotel rooms that doubled as treehouses, and where we were greeted like family. It felt, as it so often does in Mexico, like we were being welcomed home. And what better to share with our community than that? We decided on the spot that this was the place, and never so much as peeked at another venue.

Mexico has a magical way about it. A certain generosity of spirit and laissez-faire attitude toward rules has made it our home away from home these past few years, and in each of its distinct corners we find some things constant: abundant natural beauty, delectable food, and incredible locals. Mexicans understand something powerful about how to live well. It has become, for us, a nation defined by its warmth.

To that end, any theme our wedding had was an extension of the environment – the words we kept coming back to were lush, warm, sensual, inviting, and FUN. The venue – set on 25 acres of palm trees and mango groves – did a lot of the work for us, so we focused on the details that would ensure our guests had a magical experience, like excellent and plentiful food and drink, vibey live music during the cocktail hour and a spectacular DJ we flew in from Brooklyn, additional reception lighting timed to the music, and my husband’s favorite: a smoke machine that took the dance floor to another level. Many people (including our photographers!) deemed it the wildest wedding dance party they’d experienced, the servers told us we drank tequila like Mexicans, and what we’ve heard most often in the weeks since is that our guests felt well taken care of. These are the highest honors we could be granted.

Tell us about your main outfits:

I wore a cowl neck, dangerously low back Katie May dress that evoked Old Hollywood glamour, with thick gold hoops (my signature!) to keep things unfussy and free. During the reception, I changed into a blush silk, again backless midi dress that I knew would allow me to feel unfettered on the dance floor. It worked!

Ian wore a Suit Supply blue suit and white button-down with no tie (an ask we made of all our guests – who needs a neck prison?), and white Cole Haan sneakers. He didn’t have an outfit change, unless you count people unbuttoning his shirt over the course of the evening.

What were some of the most memorable/unique moments from the day?

Both of us grew up somewhat unconventionally, so the notion of marriage in its traditional connotation didn’t hold much water for us. That meant thinking critically about each of the component parts of a wedding and only holding on to what felt personally resonant, as well as adding details we hadn’t seen before. We wanted our ceremony to feel inclusive and celebratory, so we encouraged people to clap and holler as we walked down the aisle, and began the ceremony by having everyone close their eyes and focus their energy in the space. It was powerful – I highly recommend it. We also had plants in the audience – friends and family members who popped up sporadically to share a story about us. We hadn’t heard them prior to the ceremony, so it was a lovely surprise for all. Ian forwent any kind of traditional structure for his vows and instead told a story that had everyone enraptured; it was poetry. I’m the “writer” in the relationship, but he blew me out of the water and I loved it.

We had a half-hour dance set before we sat for dinner, which got everyone feeling festive and kept the energy up during the meal (the endless stream of tequila shots also helped). When my mom took the floor to speak, she was having trouble holding both the mic and her speech, so Ian’s mom got up to hold the mic for her. They stood there, arms around each other, Ian’s mom intermittently offering support in hilarious and touching fashion. There wasn’t a dry eye in the house. And my dad – who’s technically my stepfather – wrote a song for me and surprised me with it later in the reception. He’d written songs for each of his biological daughters the day they were born, and on my wedding day I got mine. He danced and sang like a maniac, and my heart exploded for the 90th time that weekend.

And that dance floor! Like I said: lit. When the official wedding wrapped, we moved the remaining party monsters to a rooftop where a friend assumed the role of DJ, our DJ assumed the role of guest, and the music and cocktails continued for many hours.

Any advice for other couples planning to spend the rest of their lives together?

For a long time, I thought being married wouldn’t make a tremendous difference – we’ve been together and in love a long time, have lived together many years, and very early on decided to spend our lives with one another. But I adored the idea of celebrating our love with those who’ve helped us become who we are – both independently and to each other – to thank them for their support and ask for its continued presence in the years to come. Plus, we’re extremely into food and cocktails (I’m a former restaurant critic) and hot dance floors, so a wedding made sense.

In the end, as perfect as our wedding was – and it was as damn near perfect as we could have imagined – it was but a day, and what everyone says about it being over in a flash is true. Being married, on the other hand, has felt profound in a way that I find deeply surprising and satisfying, profound in a way I can’t begin to articulate.

If there’s a kernel of advice in here, it’s this: don’t be surprised when things surprise you (or do! It’s fun either way). Which is to say – the thing you’re placing the most importance on may not turn out to matter as much as you anticipated, while something you overlooked as inconsequential may turn out to be THE VERY THING. And isn’t that the sublime essence of life? I think so.

Venue & Catering: Acre Baja | Videographer: Luke Dejoras and Jay Whiting | Photographer: A Fist Full of Bolts | Celebrant: Ben Offenberg (friend of couple) | Entertainment: DJ Alias for ceremony and reception; David Morin during cocktail hour | Planner: Gaby Curiel, Amy Abbott Events | Flora: Cristina Gonzalez, Bazaar Cabo | Bride’s Dress:  Katie May – Barcelona dress | Groom’s suit: Suit Supply | Groom’s shoes: Cole Haan | Makeup & Hair: Olga Bustos, Los Cabos | Fragrance: Chloé  | Wedding Website: www.serenaandian.com